"Anyone can say 'Hands up who wants to see a pig?'" A statement of fact that will forever echo through the annals of my mind. Martin Freeman and some guy I remember from a Sci-Fi called FAQ About Time Travel get a whole load of kids together to improvise some lines and generally partake in lots of montages to broadly terrible songs. However, it is hard to be mean about a film that in all conceivably ways feels like a home movie, with a tiny budget. Nativities are notoriously something we tend to do to commemorate the birth of Jesus in winter rather than just pulling one out in the summer time because we want to freak people out. Considering that i wouldn't be strange if this did rather well.
The Christmas Story
Martin Freeman is really sick and tired of being a school teacher. The girl he loved has, to his knowledge, made it big in 'Hollywood' and now he has got to put on a big Nativity again even though he just couldn't care less. Little mini review: This is the naffest piece of naff anyone has ever created and yet, by simply letting the kids do what they would normally do and say what they want to say, the children are oddly convincing and one thing is for sure, it convinced me that Martin Freeman would be a great dad. It's sort of Christmas by association here and I think if I were to have a child of my own I'd much rather just go watch their play but it's cute enough, my Mum was really smitten with it.
The Voice of Christmas
I didn't have a clue here so I asked my Mum and with all the joy of a giddy schoolgirl she replied "Mr. Poppy for sure he was so lovely" So there you go. She isn't wrong, he is in all ways a sort of really obnoxious guardian angel.
The Annoying Kid at Christmas
In a film that is heaving with potential annoying children, not a single stands out as that annoying. They are mostly just troubled, sincere little actors. Mr Poppy is just a prick though. I get it, he's a kid at heart and I also can understand a world in which kids think he is funny but I just really needed him to go away.
The Christmas Miracle
They take two children to 'Hollywood' and don't get the school's or the parent's permission. This is promptly resolved by the headteacher being a bit miffed and telling them off. And that's it.
The Christmas Message
If you put loads of kids in a film and they aren't child actors you can't criticise the film in anyway or you are just being a twat. Also put on a Nativity play and those who have fallen out of love with you with come running back into your arms
-Sam wants me to mention that Ricky Tomlinson was in it and he was the mayor +1
-I ate a wispa gold whilst watching it +1
I've been avoiding watching any of the films in this series because I was well aware it just wasn't my thing so rather than me closing this one off, I'll get my Mum:
"Out of 25!? Okay, if you watched this anytime of the year it might seem a little bit lame but on Christmas Eve it is the perfect little feelgood movie 20/25".
So there you go.